Mona* is a doctoral researcher in a part-time, structured, online PhD programme who is based outside of the UK in a country directly affected by war. Here is her story in her own words.

*Mona chose her own pseudonym

The fact that I’m enrolled in this PhD programme gives me a sense of purpose, which contributes positively to my wellbeing because I’m doing something for myself and pursuing something that I love. And the fact that it is online allows me to keep my job and build my career while pursuing my PhD. It’s like personal growth for me. It’s doing something that I care about other than my job. Sometimes when I want to take a break from the job, I will be very happy to work on my thesis. It’s like taking my mind off other things because it’s something I love and I genuinely care about. So, yeah, it gives me a sense of purpose.

It taught me to be more responsible in a way because I had to take full responsibility for managing my time and progress in both my job and PhD. And so, it made me more skilled at time management, which is honestly something I used to struggle with. You know, I thought I worked better under pressure. I used to keep things for the last minute. So, I really preferred for someone else to put the deadline for me. Yeah, but I’ve learned to control myself. I’ve learned to schedule my tasks properly because, you know, if I was pressured in my PhD, that would also affect my job. So, I had to really be responsible. But still, you know, I want to give my best to both. So that’s where I say responsibility because I don’t want to just focus on my PhD and forget the job that is waiting for me on the other side or vice versa.

I used to, for instance, sometimes study in my working hours and or work after my studying hours. So, I didn’t schedule my time properly. You know, things were kind of messy. But then when I started doing the, you know, daily planner and organising my tasks, several aims for a month, for instance, and then I divided weekly, then I divided daily. So that helped me like giving the right time for the job-related tasks and the right time for tasks.

Your own circle does not always get the struggles of an academic life. But they have been very supportive through the process because the second I sit with my friends or my family it helps me to disconnect, you know, from both my job and my pieces. And so, it makes me feel more grounded. Yeah, another thing that has helped me is physical activity. Sometimes I also journal because you know, you have a lot of thoughts, and it would be messy in your head, and it helps me organise my thoughts. Yeah, and sometimes I honestly take a few steps back.

I have seen personal growth. I mean, it was very difficult for me because, for instance, English is not my first language. So, I had to train myself and just deal with the mistakes I’m doing when I’m talking. You know, I’m growing my network, which is something that I care about and I love. So yeah, basically I’ve seen some personal growth. And that’s what’s nice about it.

My supervisor’s been very supportive. She’s guided me a lot, especially in my systematic literature review. And she knows that. I asked for meetings twice per month. She was always there. You know, she gives constructive feedback. She doesn’t, you know, some people give feedback while demotivating you. She doesn’t do that at all. She’s very friendly and, you know, I really appreciate her checking in when, you know, at times of war. You know, there’s nothing she can literally do, but you know, it’s just the idea of, you know, being thought of, you know, makes you feel like a part of a community, even though it’s online.  A supervisor must be empathetic, consistent and honest.

There’s the software maybe that we were taught on like EndNote. It’s just it saves a lot of time and, you know, it helps in some way, teams to stay connected. Some of my PhD peers and I have this WhatsApp group to chat and check on each other from time to time. So yeah, of course, technology does help. I sometimes find the volume of emails overwhelming, but overall technology helps me stay connected and manage tasks. It helps us communicate with each other and, you know, save time and the technical tasks also.

You know, when you’re at the university studying or you’re learning on campus, you’ll form a group of peers or friends. It’s like a friendly support group. I think everything in person is easier than online because I don’t want to nag for someone who is already busy with their lives and I don’t know if they’re, you know, busy in the right moment or not. So yeah, that’s why I feel when it’s, you know, in person, it’s more natural and spontaneous.

Another challenge is, you know, feeling isolation. I don’t really have that daily interaction with other PhD students. So, you know, sometimes it feels like you’re going through the process alone, which can affect motivation, especially when things don’t go as planned. So, you may, you know, face delays or difficulty obtaining ethical approval, or maybe challenges in data collection, and I feel like this is the part when you start, you know, self-doubting yourself and your progress.

Yeah, it’s when you, you know, reach this point of maybe stress that you say that your mental health is more important than my thesis and my job. And because I felt like I can’t give my best if I’m, you know, this stressed or this pressured. So that’s why I started prioritising my mental health and, you know, taking a few days off just to, you know, disconnect a bit and come back maybe stronger and more focused.

The war has affected my wellbeing because it feels unfair at times. It’s just you’re in the wrong geographical area. You’re not involved in any of, you know, the problems. And, you know, it feels more stressful because I had to put things on hold for a few weeks because it’s not practical to do any of the interviews or data collection, for instance. But I’ve received a few messages of concern from my supervisors and my peers, which I really appreciate and makes me feel that I belong to an online community. I think that the university does it best to support our wellbeing. Now, concerning the political instability and the worst situation, I really, really don’t know what they can do about it because I can’t take the decision myself if I want to take time off or not. And, you know, no one knows how long it’s going to take and it’s completely out of our control. But, you know, I think that has helped me through that journey is, you know, meeting the people I’ve met in the annual residential event, you know, and connecting and doing a group chat where we check on each other from time to time and, you know, talk about our progress. I don’t know if it exists or not, but maybe, you know, a chat group for maybe the PhD students of the same year to have a group chat where they, you know, check on each other from time to time or maybe online gatherings twice per month and so on.